Saturday, June 4, 2011

In love for the 10th time

It is always fascinating to watch a movie depicting the romantic relationship between two people. Contemporary media has a very grabbing way of describing how this feeling evolves.
  • It starts out with two seemingly unlikely individuals meeting
  • A mix of stories is brought into play conjuring up circumstances that creates a “spark” or some form of connection
  • Both later share moments that nurtures that spark; it could be an accidental kiss or a discussion in which certain emotions are revealed, or it could be just time spent together 
  • To spice things up, we spin in a twist in which one of the individuals (usually the female) is made to question the love of the other  
  • The other person (usually the male) then comes to the rescue, delivering an intense statement about the moments spent together and how he/she realized that they are standing face to face with the ONE. Their spark is revived with that special kiss (can you hear that soulful and electrifying music in the background?)

After watching for an hour thirty minutes, we are “educated” on new ways in which two people can meet the ONE they dream of, fall in “love”, get married and live happily ever after. Most romantic movies, (with little variation here and there), follow this template; though delivering a story that can make the pattern seem non-existent.
Don’t get me wrong I love romantic movies.
  •  I loved when Tristan danced with Yvaine aboard the thunder capturing ship (in the movie “Star dust”) and she (being a star) glows and giggles. It was magical how she glowed when she asked him if he was tempted by lure of eternal life.
  • Giselle song “How do you know” to Robert, and her last glance at him after the beautiful dance to Jon McLaughlin’s “So close” was, just as the name of the movie goes, “Enchanted”.

But is there a possibility that more and more of these movies re-wire us to think of love in terms of youthfulness and sparks?  Let us face it; very few people in this world possess their own original opinion on issues. Opinion leaders recycle/synthesize other opinions till they arrive at a conclusion that seems to resonate with what they think reality should be. The rest of the world just follows what the main stream says. And when the main stream says we run, we ask how far?

So when the media gives a suggestion about what relationship is all about, people act based on their interpretation of what they heard.  If the world continually uses the lens of contemporary media for its definition of what love is, it might affect some relationships in areas of longevity as people interpret the lack of a “spark” for incompatibility.

On a personal note, it has been 3 years since I met her.  It was exciting as we explored each other’s routines and developed our combined motions. Then the thrills of a 1st kiss and holding hands and just getting to understand someone who thought the world about you          (maybe because she didn’t know Marriage, which was a year ago, led to uncharted territory. If I look forward to that thrills of a 1st kiss again, I could be destroying the foundation of a wonderful home and even the mental stability of a role model in the next generation.

Instead our desires should be towards a deeper bond; one that provides the other, the required support for dealing with the pressures of everyday life while maintaining an inner balance. It should be towards understanding each other’s visions and working out ways in which we can accomplish all we hope to achieve. We should be conceptualizing methods towards opening up the pathways to each other’s souls. In this process entangling our minds to a point where they are no longer separable.

And that should be the desire and mark of fulfillment in all relationships. The world should celebrate couples who are able to hold on through thick and thin, because the solid foundation of the histories we treasured were build on people who endured and developed characters under harsh conditions.

I think that should be the renewed focus of contemporary media; reminding people of the joy of falling in love again, even for the 10th time.


  1. wao- really deep- i love the choice of words.
    i partcularly like the foundational truth communicated. Real love is we made it work!
    Classic- i think

  2. I have a hair routine on my blog

  3. I think the media and everyone else has a secret escape place where we dream and wish these ideals as our reality, the diffrence is the media has a more real place to experience it and make us experience it. thank you for the reality check.